Child Behavior Problems

/Child Behavior Problems
Child Behavior Problems 2016-12-12T14:55:18+00:00

Are You Struggling To Manage Your Child’s Behavior?

child has tantrum outside on mom's legAre you exhausted by your child’s tantrums? Are you tired of repeating yourself to your child? Does your child talk back, defy or ignore your instructions? You may receive regular calls from school complaining about your child’s behavior. You might find yourself losing it with your child, or even avoiding spending time with him or her. Are these problems affecting your relationship with your partner? Have you run out of things to try?

Parenting can be challenging on its own, and it is even more frustrating and stressful when your child is frequently testing limits, losing control, fighting with you or having meltdowns. It can feel like you are constantly exhausted and worn down when almost everything seems like a struggle for your child and your family.

You might struggle to concentrate at work as you worry about how your child is doing while you are away. Maybe you feel anxious all the time, waiting for teachers or school counselors to call you about your child’s poor behavior or performance in class. When you and your partner are both home, you might fight about how to discipline your child or how to share parenting duties. You and your partner might feel burnt-out and may be ashamed to admit that you just don’t enjoy being around your child or together as a family anymore. The stress from a long, chaotic day with your child might leave you feeling hopeless and make it difficult to fall or stay asleep at night. You might wish you could turn to your partner for comfort and support, but find that you now struggle to connect with each other.

Parents Face Incredible Challenges

Families can be an incredible source of joy and support. That said, heightened stress, transitions and challenges with children can leave parents feeling defeated and alone. A recent study that asked parents to rank a list of pleasurable activities found that “parenting” ranks 16th – lower than making dinner, exercising and housework. If you’re feeling overwhelmed as a parent, please know that you are not alone. Many parents find themselves at their wit’s end. In a search for answers, they bravely seek help from books and online resources. Although these resources can be helpful, they can also feel too simplistic, not relevant to your child or family or too hard to follow. As you struggle to find the answers you need, you may be left feeling even more frustrated, and hopeless.

The good news is that you can get individualized parenting support to help you better understand your child’s needs. You can learn tools to deal with challenging situations and ultimately feel more effective and in control as a parent. With parenting counseling at Relationship HQ (formerly Dr. Bukky & Associates), we support you and your partner in finding the parenting style that works for you, your child, and your family.

Parenting Counseling Can Help You Build A Peaceful Home

Our parenting coaches offer a unique approach to addressing child behavior problems. We have seen that parent counseling can be more effective than child counseling in fostering a healthy parent-child relationship. We work primarily with parents and caregivers, both in our office and through home visits, to create lasting and positive change for your child and family.

The process begins with you and your partner (or other relevant caregiver) meeting your parenting coach in our comfortable New York City office. Our aim is to understand your family’s current experience, as well as your goals for your child and family. Your parenting coach will focus on discovering the values that are important to your family to help guide your parenting style. Additionally, you and your partner will have the opportunity to talk about your relationship with each other and discuss how it is influencing your parenting. At the end of this first meeting, you can schedule a time for your parenting coach to visit your family in your home, in order to directly experience how things work in your natural setting.

During the home visit, your parenting coach will begin to establish a relationship with your child in order to understand what triggers his or her difficulties. This will help your coach recommend strategies that are ideally suited and effective for you and your child. These parenting strategies will be described and discussed in our feedback and ongoing sessions to make sure they are fitting for you and your family. In continued sessions, you and your partner can work with your parenting coach to understand and resolve the factors that are contributing to your child’s difficulties or creating distance or conflict between you and your partner. With your coach's help, you can increase your child’s positive behavior and develop positive discipline strategies that are appropriate to your child’s age and needs. You can discover new and effective ways of teaching your child to express what he or she wants without a tantrum or meltdown. You and your partner can feel more confident in knowing how to motivate your child and respond to behavior problems in firm yet nurturing ways. Additionally, you can learn to use visual tools to help your family better manage time and responsibilities and plan ahead for routinely difficult situations – e.g, routine charts, sticker charts, timers, etc. Most importantly, in subsequent in-home visits, you will experience the hands on support you need to actually put into place the parenting strategies your coach has recommended. Your parenting counselor will model, support and coach you and your partner directly in your family’s natural setting, so you can get the support you need to make your parenting plan a reality.

Our parenting counseling sessions can also focus on helping you and your partner work together to communicate more effectively with one another and strengthen your bond. You both will have the chance to reflect on your upbringing and gain a deeper understanding of yourselves and how your history affects your current parenting. You can discover ways to maintain positive patterns of communication that allow you to feel heard, respected and supported. With support and a willingness to explore yourself, your family and your relationship, you can both feel empowered, knowing that you are guiding your family based on the beliefs, values and morals that are important to you.

Our parenting coaches have extensive experience working with parents and children, including teaching in elementary school classrooms and completing trainings and certification in well-established programs for parents and children, such as Parent-Child Interaction Therapy (PCIT) and Collaborative Problem Solving (CPS).

You may be interested in parenting counseling but still have a few questions and concerns…

I believe my child needs a therapist, not me.A photo of happy girl with arms around father. Young man is looking at daughter smiling. They are in casuals at home.

While child counseling can be helpful in many ways, much of the available research shows that it is more effective to teach you and other primary caregivers in the home how to support and guide your child to make positive changes. Given the limited amount of time/exposure a therapist would have with your child (under an hour a week), it is often more useful to focus on equipping you with the right tools and techniques to help shape your child’s behavior. This approach offers the additional benefit of increasing your confidence in parenting, extending the use of parenting strategies to other children, and knowing how to tackle problems that arise as your child gets older.

My partner does not want to participate in parenting counseling.

While it would be ideal to work with all the primary caregivers in your child’s life, we recognize that is not always possible. Single, married or partnered, we are happy to work with you and your child!

I am worried about the investment of time and money. Will parenting coaching be worth it?

We try to make parent coaching financially accessible to all families, and we offer a range of fees to fit your budget. The health of your family – be it good or bad – affects all areas of your life. Parenting counseling can improve your child’s behavior, help you and your partner strengthen your bond and alleviate family stress. You are the best person to determine its worth to you and your family.

You Can Have A Cohesive, Respectful And Loving Family

If you are ready to increase your use of effective parenting strategies and feel connected and on the same team with your partner, or if you have additional questions about parenting counseling, call us at 212.730.7400 to schedule a complimentary 15-minute phone consultation or in-person meet-and-greet to discuss your needs and ask any questions you have about parenting coaching.

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